I’m that friend…

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Image credit: tinybuddha.com

Image credit: tinybuddha.com

There’s something that’s been on my mind for years. And lately I’ve thought enough about it to want to say something. I don’t know whether I will keep this blog post up, because I may feel like hiding how I feel again, but for now… I just want to talk about it.

You know people tend to care about friends, make them a huge part of their life, the friends you want to talk to and will easily start the conversation with first if you want to talk to them? I’m not that friend.

I’m ‘the filler friend’, you may say. Allow me to elaborate.

I’ve had lots of different groups of friends growing up and it’s not like each friend group has mutual friend groups with the other groups. Most are complete strangers to one another. But imagine when you’re in a conversation and you begin talking and have something you want to say and then someone will talk over you and people will suddenly turn their attention to them and not give a flying fruit as to what you were saying so you just quiet down. Or when it comes to a group of friends, there’s always someone in the back, who quite frankly almost has to jog to keep up with the others and be walking close enough to be involved. That’s the person I always have been. No matter who I’ve been friends with.

They ask why when I do talk, I’m loud, but it’s because I’m for once trying to be heard. I’m never the friend like “omg I wanna hang out with Jazz, I wonder what Jazz is up to?” Unless, of course, I have or am doing something they want. Like a free concert, or going somewhere good, or able to get free stuff. I’m just the friend that nobody truly gives a damn about.

It’s been this way for as long as I remember. When I was really young in primary school. I mean I would understand if I was an obviously boring person, but I’d like to think that I’m not? Like I have stories I can tell, I have opinions and similarities to all of those friends. But I’m not the one they genuinely feel interested in or want to start talking to first.

The past 7 or so years I’ve had some very unusual and wonderful opportunities thanks to my hobbies or career and sometimes they can be beneficial or interesting to others. People liked that and I thought it was a perfect way to make myself ‘the relevant friend’. But in all honesty? It just made me the ‘friend we need to be friends with because you never know, she could offer us something great’. And that seriously sucks.

I guess maybe this does play a big part in my low self esteem and why I lack so much confidence. Because no matter who I’m friends with, I will always be ‘that’ friend.

Recently, I became friends with someone and, for once, I wasn’t seen as that friend. They were genuinely interested in me and wanted to talk to me and we talked all the time and became really close and I finally felt like someone ACTUALLY liked me for me and wanted to be my friend. But sadly, all good things do come to an end and when things went wrong, I ended up losing that friendship. We’re hopefully trying to patch that up and starting again – at least that’s what I hope the outcome is because I found them as amazing and interesting and a great friend as they made out to think of me. Losing them had a huge impact on me and to live without them  is a dreadfully painful thought. I hope we can patch things up and get to be the way we were because it was a friendship I valued so much and was so afraid to lose and then I did. And it broke me.

I’m sorry for this negative post. I just needed to let off some steam. I needed to be able to talk about it. Maybe someone out there will read this and relate to me. Or maybe I’m just writing a rambling rant and nobody will ever read it, but at least it’s off my chest.

While we’re on the topic of apologising, I’m sorry I haven’t been greatly active on here, either. But things should change soon. I have plans and ideas for what to post and hopefully they’ll be put into action soon. So catch you then.

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June and July Favourites 2016

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Hello, strangers!

I didn’t have too many favourites during June, so I decided to do two months in one. I’ve also been fairly busy the past two months so forgive me for the lack of posts.

 

LUSH’s Grease Lightning

Grease Lightning

My wonderful friend recently sent me a goody box of lovely LUSH products and I took a shine to this one in particular. This zit zapper which includes Fair Trade organic aloe vera gel, fresh sea water and grape juice as some of its alluring ingredients is definitely a winner with me. Throughout June I had a few nasty breakouts of one or two big whoppers and this beaut in a bottle really came to the rescue in sorting them out.

Available for £6.50

LUSH’S Coalface cleanser

Coalface

Another product I received was the Coalface cleanser. This was one of the first ever LUSH products I tried and I’ve fallen in love with it all over again. The smell for me takes me back to when I first started using the products, which is nice, but may not be to everyone’s liking. You use it like a typical soap and wash off and it cleanses your skin nicely and consistently.

Available from £5.95

 ‘Girls Talk Boys’ by 5 Seconds of Summer

The Aussie foursome are back with a brand new single and this time, it’s pretty special. The track belongs to the soundtrack of the 2016 remake of ‘Ghostbusters’. The song gives off some very retro funk vibes which honestly makes me think of putting on some flares and heading out to my local disco to bust some moves. As an introvert, however, I just listen to it as I get on with work and mime my heart out.

 

‘Brand New Moves’ by Hey Violet

Speaking of 5 Seconds of Summer, their first band signed to their label, ‘Hi or Hey Records’, have released the lead track of their new EP, ‘Brand New Moves’. Hey Violet are back a year on from their debut ‘I Can Feel It’ and following 5SOS on the retro sounds. I’ve been listening to this song on repeat since the release at the end of July and I honestly cannot wait to hear the upcoming EP releasing later this month.

Tanya Burr Cosmetics matte lip in ‘Martha Moo’

Martha Moo

Beauty guru, Tanya Burr, has released a new range to her beauty line and I was extremely excited to get my hands on the matte lip in the colour ‘Martha Moo’, named after her dog, Martha. The colour reminds me of a 90s grunge which is rich in colour and only needs one application to create the perfect matte lip.

Available for £5.99

 

‘New Dynasty’ EP by Camryn

Camryn is back with her brand new EP, ‘New Dynasty’, which is a five track extended play. Camryn’s sound has matured since her One Direction tour days and is a prime example of where she plans to take her music. I’m super excited to see her near future plans.

‘You Don’t Know Love’ by Olly Murs

Olly has released the first single from his upcoming untitled album and it’s definitely a right bop. I managed to meet up with Murs (after that story) on his radio tour promoting the single and it’s definitely thrilling and refreshing to hear his new music on the airwaves once again.

 

This has been a music-heavy two months for me! What have you been loving lately?

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Quick doggy treats: Chicken Bites

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If you’re unable to go to the shop or fancy trying something different for your furry friend, then this quick recipe is easy enough for you to make a tasty treat which your dogs will love!

Dog treats

Ingreedients 

  • 200g flour
  • 1 tablespoon of butter/flora/stork
  • Fresh chicken stock

Instructions

  1. Rub the flour and butter together to make crumbs
  2. Add chicken stock to mix
  3. Mix until dough
  4. Roll out dough
  5. cut shapes
  6. Cook in a medium temperature oven for about 10 minutes
  7. Leave to cool

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Louis and Pepsi love these and I’m sure you’re dogs will, too!

Let me know if you make these and how you get on.

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May Monthly Favourites 2016

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We’re already halfway through the year and I have no idea how. But anyway, here are this month’s favourites!

LUSH’s Rub Rub Rub shower scrub

Rub Rub Rub

I’ve been hearing about this product a lot and I honestly have no idea why I was reluctant to buying it until recently. Thanks to my friend who actually works at LUSH, she totally sang the praises of this product and told me about how people use it as an alternative to shampoo and conditioner. I was sold and gave it a go and oh my goodness, it’s amazing. If you have oily hair then this is amazing. My hair feels so clean and well looked after. I use a slight bit of conditioner on the ends but the rest is just this. It’s also amazing for your body, too. Rub Rub Rub is full of mineral-rich sea salt and organic lemon juice which cleanses the pores and exfoliates your skin. I have been obsessed with this product all month and I’m desperate to get some more. Next time I’ll get the bigger tub for sure.

Get it here for £8.95

LUSH’s Pumice Power

Pumice Power

Another LUSH product I’ve been loving is LUSH’s Pumice Power. I have pretty rough skin on the bottom of my feet and again, my friend from LUSH had my back and introduced me to this little beauty. You just use it in the bath or with a bowl of water and rub it like a pumice stone and it just does wonders for your feet. It may take more than one use to get rid of all the rough skin, but it’s definitely worth it.

Get it here for £3.25

Colourpop – Bianca

Colourpop

I saw Zoella wearing this colour and I couldn’t help but be intrigued with what she was wearing. Thankfully, Zoë was a babe and left a link in the YouTube video of the colour. I ordered it and it was such a beautiful colour which I feel could be used with many different looks.This is a matte liquid lipstick but doesn’t feel too drying. The product seemed to last a long time on my lips, especially when I was out all day in Cardiff and wore it. Of course, when eating it didn’t stay whole so I did apply again to keep it fresh but the overall colour actually stayed and I was pretty impressed.

Get it here for $6.00

 

Reggie N Bollie – New Girl


The X Factor runners-up, Reggie N Bollie, have released their debut single and while I wasn’t their biggest fan during their time on the show, I definitely love this song. It screams summer and has Caribbean vibes. Plus there’s a lot of steel drums which I’m a sucker for in a summer song. I’ve been playing this song a lot since the release and it’s possibly en route for being my song of the summer.

Emma Blackery – Sucks to be You EP

British YouTuber/singer-songwriter, Emma Blackery, released her comeback EP in May and it is honestly such a jam. The pop-punk sound reminds me of the early to mid 00’s and is definitely the kind of music I’m into. There’s not much else to say but it’s just perfect for any pop-rock/pop-punk lovers.

 

What have you been enjoying this month?

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My Top 5 LUSH Products

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LUSH is one of my favourite beauty brands and I mention their products a fair bit on this blog. I have a lot of products I’m love with but I’ve actually narrowed it down to five that I love the most which I’m recommending in this post.

 

5. Milky Bath bubble bar

milky bath

This bubble bar is definitely my favourite from LUSH. It contains orange oil and actual skimmed milk so while there’s no expiry date, I definitely recommend using this sooner rather than later. This bar creates a LOT of bubbles which, let’s be honest, are a major plus when it comes to bath time. I definitely recommend!

Get it here for £3.75

4. Charity Pot hand and body lotion

Charity Pot

This lotion is so soft on the skin and has a light and floral scent to it. Ingredients include Fair Trade shea butter, Rosewood Oil and Ylang Ylang oil. The best bit? 100% of the proceeds (minus VAT) go to various good causes  and the lid of your product tells you which charity you have supported. Feel good in more than one way!

Get it for £3.50

3. Love Lettuce fresh face mask

Love Lettuce

This mask does wonders for my pores. It tightens them and helps balance out the oil in my t-zone. It smells amazing and includes seaweed gel, almond oil and honey. My face looks so much cleaner and brighter and feels super soft!

Get it for £6.75

2. Cup O’Coffee exfoliating mask

Cup O Coffee

It’s funny because I don’t really like the taste of coffee but I absolutely love the smell. This exfoliating mask is an absolute Godsend. I have rough patches on my elbows and just after 10 minutes of putting this on them and washing it off, they were baby smooth. No surprise this includes coffee infusion! It works well as both a face and body mask and makes your skin feel so soft.

Get it for £6.75

1. Intergalactic bath bomb

Intergalactic

My number one LUSH product is the Intergalactic bath bomb. It was in my April monthly favourites and as you can see from there, it’s like looking at the galaxy in your bath! It’s also super refreshing with ingredients such as grapefruit oil and peppermint oil. I love a good bath bomb, especially when it’s like watching a show of explosions full of colour when you put it in the water!

Get it for £3.95

What’s your favourite LUSH product?

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April Monthly Favourites 2016

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I mention this basically every single post and I’m still not over how quick this year is going! The concert weekend I was so excited for has already been and gone and we’re almost halfway through 2016. But anyway… here are my April favourites!

External 50000mAh Power Bank Pack

power bank

This power bank was a lifesaver at my concert weekend. My phone battery isn’t the greatest, especially since there’s currently an issue with my phone that needs sorting out ASAP, so to have something with me to use on the go was very handy. It’s a bit heavy but the amount of power available from it was amazing. I didn’t need to charge it once over the three days I used it, though I did use a standard phone charger in the hotel. However, the days lasted from as early as 9am til 3am the next day, so considering I was on-off using this to boost my phone throughout those three days, this was definitely worth it. Again, it’s slightly heavy but if you’re going on a short weekend break or a big day out (example; a day at a theme park like Disneyland) this would be perfect.

Get it from eBay for £11.49

Peter Pan phone case

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As previously mentioned in another post, I am a big lover of Peter Pan. I needed a new phone case and saw this one online. I love how it’s not too “childlike” and is quite different from a typical style phone case. I think it captures one of my favourite parts of the story which is where they fly over London to Neverland and the background is a page out of the original Peter Pan fairytale book, which is lovely.

Get it from eBay for £4.75

Wunderlist

wunderlist

This app was recommended to me by my boss as when I started my full time position at Maximum Pop! It was difficult at first to keep track of everything. I’m a very technology-based kind of person and as much as I love a good notebook, I’m currently in the middle of doing my room out so I don’t have a desk to keep things in. It’s easy to keep track of your to-do lists and even offers for you to create multiple categories. I’ve recently had a category for ‘concerts’ (as you all know by now about my big concert weekend, I had a lot of prepping!) as well as work and a private list for day-to-day things like medication reminders,etc. Not only does it pop up as a reminder on your phone, but you can also get emails sent to you. If you have an Apple laptop/computer you can also download the app on there and it syncs up to the one on your phone/tablet.

Get the app here

LUSH’s Intergalactic bath bomb

Intergalactic

I may have featured this previously, but this is definitely my favourite bath bomb from LUSH. It brings the beauty of outer space right into your bathtub and is very uplifting. There are a few oils amongst the ingreedients including grapefruit, peppermint and cedarwood oil and it definitely feels soothing to the skin. Not to mention it’s very aesthetically pleasing.
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Get it from LUSH for £3.95

 

What have you been loving this month?

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5SOS’ Ashton Irwin becomes a hero for the night!

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If you follow this blog and my social media, you’ll know that last weekend I was in Cardiff for a 5 Seconds of Summer concert weekend along with some friends. While we were there, something that only happens in fan fiction happened. 5 Seconds of Summer’s drummer, Ashton Irwin, booked my friend a hotel room! Crazy, right?

Ashton (left) was Laura's superhero for the night

                                                 Ashton (left) was Laura’s superhero for the night

While the media are hounding her for the 411, Laura agreed to speak to me about the craziness that took place early Saturday morning.

Hey Laura! So, what was the situation that led you to Ashton being your saviour of the night?

Hi Jazz!  Basically the hotel room that my friend’s boyfriend booked had accidentally been booked for 2 people rather than 3 so as I was supposed to meet them later I ended up not being able to stay in that room.

Where were you when he found you?

I was outside the back of the arena when Ashton’s taxi pulled up.

Did you ask him for help or was it his own decision to take matters into his hands?

Actually I didn’t even start the conversation! I didn’t want to trouble him so I just smiled and waved and he came over to ask how I was doing. I explained my situation and he asked why I couldn’t buy myself a room in the hotel across the road so I told him I had no money. He swiftly replied that he did and crossed the road to the hotel.

Was there any doubt that he’d not be able to get a room?

Well to be honest I thought he was trying to convince the hotel staff to let me crash on yours and Sarah’s hotel room floor.

That’s security being too tight! Did he end up pulling the “famous” card by any chance?

I did make a joke along the lines of ‘use your fame to make them let me stay’ and he laughed! 

What was your reaction when he offered to book you a room?

I was gobsmacked. I thought he was just going to tell me to ‘stay safe’ and walk away but no! I was so close to tears I was that grateful. (Being absolutely shattered didn’t help on the tear front haha)

If you could meet with him again, what would you like to say to him?

I would want him to know how incredibly grateful I am! I did thank him a lot that night but I wasn’t fully composed haha. I’d like to be a lot calmer and tell him how much it meant to me and probably give him another cheeky hug!

People often say celebrities and pop stars have a big ego – what would you say about that?

I mean some celebrities might but I don’t think 5sos do at all. Every time i’ve met them they’ve always been so lovely! It was almost 3 am I don’t think Ash was in the mood to meet people (which I don’t blame him for, he was off to bed!) He didn’t have to meet me that night let alone help me out! That just shows how caring he is!

So much happened at the 5SOS weekend which you can find out in my vlogs

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